"Discovery channel"

AAArgghhh!!!

maanantaina, marraskuuta 22, 2004

The Leaking Uterus

So as I recently “discovered” my husbands writings on all the gorgeous girls he meets on his way home and how he drawls after them hoping to have some kind of contact with their flirtatious “ass, body and face”. I felt the need to also note down what happens to me on my way to work or home:

I can honestly say that I don’t find anything flirtatious in men staring at me and checking me out from top to bottom. As soon as I leave home and stand in the stairs locking up the door I will most certainly hear a honk and a “Whoo..!” if a car passes by. At least at the bus stop most of the cars that contain some sort of capable men will let me know how they appreciate my beauty and would most certainly bone me if they got the chance. If there are any men (I don’t mean to be evil or anything but usually Latin men) passing me on the street, exiting the bus with me or exiting when I enter it, I can be 99% certain that they will say “ Hey, gorgeous..” and then look at me under their eyebrows like they were hungry (probably for pussy) or something. (I did have once a typical wall-street man around his fifties whisper to me “Hey honey..”, which when it’s totally unexpected(you learn to expect most of the time and prepare in some kind of way for a comment) made me feel very groused out). And every time this happens I feel disgusting and dirty like I was their property and that they would have just fucked me in their minds.

The port authority area makes me breath heavily and my adrenalin rise to the roof. Here I can never guess what the next man is going to let out from his mind. So I just try to walk as fast as I can and try not to make eye contact with anyone. Something just made me amazed and jealous when my husband said that he likes to make an eye contact with everyone who passes him by!! If I would do that I would have a line of hard-ons following me!

I’m also aware that my husband wishes that I would dress more feminine and show my curves a little more and I would like that too. Wouldn’t it be nice to dress up every morning for high heels, skirt and a sexy top, put on lipstick and get out the door feeling gorgeous and feminine! The thing is I just can’t take the stares and the comments following that decision. I would rather be in something not as attention catching. Sometimes it’s nice to dress up for something that everyone has dressed up for and hear nice and polite comments on how you look, but doing that every day, forget it. I don’t know if it means that I’m not confident with myself and that I’m letting other peoples comments affect me but I have become fully aware about what I am to certain men and how a pale, green-eyed Finnish woman is so exotic and “exciting” to my Latin American neighborhood. Where does the excitement come from? Is it a natural instict for breeding yourself as far as possible? or just pure admiration for something “different”? Why does it have to be so rude and nasty? Like dirty glares and even more dirty comments?

I feel like this is one of my most seriously toned posts and it makes me feel so serious that I might need a face-lift in couple minutes. I think this pissyness has something to do with my leeking uterus(God it feels good to describe periods with disgusting honesty) Which brings me to something funny like all the silly names people have for periods. My favorite one is: “having the painter in the house”. I actually have a whole list once found in a magazine for all the names, but I will try to post that later. It’s funny.

I feel good now having explored my thoughts on disgusting men. I wish they would comment and say something like: “But I thought you women love the attention!” No we don’t. I don’t. Not that kind.